Causo
INT. NATIONAL SERVICE MEDICAL TENT – MIDDAY
The canvas walls of the makeshift exam room are dull khaki, the kind of place that smells faintly of disinfectant and nerves. A cold breeze sneaks in under the flaps, brushing bare skin.
MARK TOWSHED, 25, tattooed, pierced, and deeply skeptical of authority, stands beside JENKINS—a wiry lad with a nervous twitch—and WILKES, broad-shouldered, trying way too hard to seem unfazed.
All three are stripped to their army-issued white briefs. Goosebumps pepper their arms.
CORPORAL MURRAY, late 30s, all posture and bark, surveys them like they’re faulty rifles on parade.
CORPORAL MURRAY
(snaps)
When the doctor enters, you're to drop your drawers to your ankles. Stand still, eyes front. That clear?
ALL THREE
(in unison)
Yes, Corporal!
MARK (V.O.)
Great. First day in Bad Lads Bootcamp and I’m already half-naked in front of a guy who probably shouts in his sleep. What’s next? Public flogging?
The flap opens. In walks DR. HAWTHORNE, thin, clinical, and obviously not here to make friends. Clipboard in one hand, pen already tapping.
DR. HAWTHORNE
Proceed.
With practiced discomfort, the lads slide down their underwear. Three pairs of briefs hit the floor with a quiet shuffle. Silence. Mark swallows hard, resisting the urge to cover himself.
MARK (V.O.)
Just act natural. Don’t lock eyes with anyone. And definitely don’t think about the fact you’ve got more metal on you than a punk concert.
JENKINS (V.O.)
Oh god. This is a nightmare. Why is it so cold in here? Is everyone looking at me? Am I normal? What even is “normal”?
WILKES (V.O.)
Alright, play it cool. No sudden moves. Just another day, another... full frontal exposure in a military tent. Brilliant.
Dr. Hawthorne moves down the line. A tap to the knees. A lift of the arms. All business. But when he reaches Mark, he pauses.
A long pause.
He leans in slightly, squinting.
DR. HAWTHORNE (V.O.)
Well now. That’s certainly... unconventional.
His nose wrinkles slightly. He turns to Corporal Murray, voice low but not discreet enough.
DR. HAWTHORNE
Corporal, take a look at this.
Mark stiffens.
MARK (V.O.)
Here we go. Knew this would happen. Should’ve taken them out. But then again, screw ‘em. It’s my body.
CORPORAL MURRAY
(stepping closer)
What is it?
Dr. Hawthorne gestures downward.
Murray bends slightly, eyes narrowing. His lips tighten as he takes in the various rings—some standard, some decidedly not.
CORPORAL MURRAY (V.O.)
What the bloody hell is this lad thinking? That thing looks like it belongs in a toolbox, not a barracks.
CORPORAL MURRAY
(straightens up, frowning)
Unacceptable. That’s gotta come out. You can’t be carting that gear around in the Queen’s army.
JENKINS (V.O.)
What did he have down there? Is that safe? Legal?
WILKES (V.O.)
Honestly kind of impressed. But also — oof. He’s in for it now.
MARK
(sharply)
It’s not hurting anyone, is it?
CORPORAL MURRAY
Not the point, lad. You want to play soldier, you follow the rules. This isn't a bloody music video.
Dr. Hawthorne makes a brief note on his clipboard.
DR. HAWTHORNE
We’ll flag him for medical evaluation. Proceed with the next.
Mark slowly pulls his underwear back up. His jaw tight, face flushed — from cold, yes, but also from the judgment burning around him.
MARK (V.O.)
Could’ve just said “next” and moved on. But no. Had to make a spectacle of it. Whatever. Let’s see how they feel about tattoos next.
As they’re dismissed and shuffle out of the tent, the mood is quiet.
CORPORAL MURRAY (V.O.)
These boys don’t know what discipline is yet. But they will. One way or another.
FADE OUT.
If you want to continue this into a serialized script or show episode, I can help format it for screenplay style and build the character arcs and conflicts more deeply. Let me know!
Comentários
Postar um comentário